Mongrels Time

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In an attempt to mislead terrorists and extremists groups from
planning activities related to the Mongrels match this evening,
the Spiker Sports League General Manager is only issuing this
message to a chosen few.

Listen very carefully. I shall say this only once.
Tonight's match will be at 7:15pm - Court 2 - Grammar Dome.
I repeat 7:15pm - Court 2 - Grammar Dome.

The reason for this secrecy relates to an incident earlier this
month on Bondi Beach where it is alleged several Mongrels
players said something defamatory about an unattractive young
lady who was trying too hard to get her breasts autographed.

It happens that the young lady has a large family of big burly
brothers who took offence and demanded that one of the players
must marry the girl to restore their families honour.

It is further alleged that the players then commented on the odds
of this occurring and then informed the big burly brothers where
they could place several parts of their anatomy.

It has been discovered that the burly brothers belong to several
anti-Mongrels militant groups and have been posting slurs on
the Mongrel integrity across several extremist websites.

The Mongrels have only responded by stating they have no
integrity to slur so therefore the burly brothers actions are
meaningless.

Several members of the family have been sighted in Brisbane and
security will be on high alert in order to guarantee the safety of
the mighty Mongrels for tonight's game.

It has been suggested that decoy players may be used as stunt
doubles.

Bonky

Guru Swami Dali Lama Chief Headkicker
Mongrels Inc.