Mongrels aim for ton

After a formidable battle last week in a fast paced second half effort to achieve 90 points, Mongrels have come out this week pointing to the boundary and claiming their form is good enough to break the ton (100 points) in this weeks match against their bottom of the table opponents.

Last weeks effort saw the Mongrels again employ the missing man formation to account for the mysterious disappearance of Lisa Simpson from the lineup. Sources close to the player say she has contracted a rare strain of bird flu whilst her management are claiming it was just some dodgy KFC.

KFC's legal team have been in contact with Mongrels team management and have threatened to drop their sponsorship of the team unless the comments are retracted.

Mongrels team management have stated that "KFC had better read their contract, in particular sub-paragraph iv of Appendix M, which outlines the exit penalties for the Platinum Fast Food Category Sponsorship Agreement before they start mentioning pulling the pin."

Meanwhile a spirited performance last week saw the Mongrels move to a focussed attack through the middle supported by high quality passing and a number of 5 point service rotations.

Pussa was warned several times by the coaching staff and fellow players to restrict his underhanded handover tactics which have seen him penalised on several occassions throughout the season.

Team critics believe it stems from his recent involvement with the Over 40's Latvian Womens Handball team during a joint training camp in the Gold Coast Hinterland in March.

Mongrels players have been undertaking diligent volunteer work with worthy causes over the past few weeks, mainly to serve several community service orders from the local magistrate.

This has seen the creation of the Mongrels Mongrels Care Charity to take care of our canine friends and their families in times of need. Our hearts and thoughts go out to those at this time.

Team Management have commented that the rumours of the Mongrels Mongrels Care Charity being set up as a tax dodge to assist with salary cap pressures is "Total Bollocks!"

Tonights match at the 32,031 seat Grammar Dome has been sold out for three weeks but is available on pay-per-view.

Bonky

Canine Vetrinarian Philanthropist
Mongrels Mongrels Care Charity

Back to back victories for Mongrels

The last two weeks has seen a dramatic turn around in the form of the mighty Mongrels with back to back victories cementing their 2nd place on the Championship table.

Backing up after a solid performance last week against the White Tigers in front of a capacity crowd of 28,000 at the Grammar Dome, the Mongrels arrived with a depleted line-up due to several players attending memorial services for the Pope. Luckily the crew were able to call upon the services of T (the super sub) but still had to persevere with the missing-man formation.

Strong middle attacking was the name of the game last night with T discovering that she does have timing, even after all these years. This was supported by intimidating blocking from Lisa and constant abuse hurled between the boys due to Bonky not quite understanding the rules of street handball.

The scores were locked together at half time due to some shady back-handed deals with the referee by the Mongrels opponents but things were back on the dominating track in the second half after officials heeded threats of physical violence.

The match was sealed with a flurry of jump serving from Lisa to assure Mongrels retain their 2nd place on the ladder.

A sponsors lunch is being organised at a price of $10,000 a plate to raise funds for the Mongrels end of year bash. Details will be released shortly.

Bonky

Event Co-ordinator
Mongrels Parties and Costume Hire